Vergavige! Arvitsi Kartuli!

As is my nature, I do a lot of things by myself. I have never relied on others to get things done and it thrills me to do things for myself that are intimidating. And in Georgia, for me, simply buying a coffee gets my heart racing a bit faster. What if the waiter strays from the casual pleasantries? What if they try to rip me off? What if I say something wrong? Gah!

And the stress is for good reason, I usually pass for Georgian here. Often the older ladies are skeptical of me, unsure if I'm really a foreigner, or perhaps a Russian spy posing as a foreigner. Generally, the appearance works in my favor, as I enjoy general anonymity. This is particularly true on marshrutka rides, and in general when I'm around Georgian men, as they seem much more likely to leave me alone when they are unaware that I'm a Westerner. So when I am able to complete the task at hand without needing to have anything explained or without having to interact too much with others, this works fine for me.

It's when people ask me questions, thinking I'm a local that things get awkward. Apparently, the few words I do know, I deliver with a fairly accurate accent, and more than once, I've fooled a local, only to be revealed as a fraud 2 seconds later when I must reply to additional inquiries with Ver Gavige, Arvitsi Kartuli! or I don't understand, I don't know Georgian.

After five months of immersion, I'm red-faced embarrassed to admit I don’t' speak nearly as much Georgian as I should. I've learned the necessary basics to have my needs met: me minda [I want], arminda [I don't want], satchmeli [food], mivdivart [I'm going], sada.... [where is...], and a few variations (I know more than these few phrases, of course, but you get my gist).

Basically, I know enough to find my way around, to buy what I want, and to eat. My host family and I communicate swimmingly, pantomimes and charades, galore! But really, I haven't had a need to really learn the language. My co teachers, unlike those of some of my friends, actually speak English (who'd have thunk)! The Boy (please refer to previous entryfor details), also speaks enough English, and weekends, I generally spend with English speaking friends, who, together with their shared knowledge of Georgian, we have the communication capacity of a 4 year old, at best.

The language is also not very practical. Only Georgians speak Kartuli, and the country is no bigger than South Carolina – probably has a smaller population, too. Even it's neighbors speak entirely different languages. I say this because when I went to Armenia, I kept thinking of all the things I could say or ask to find my way around, only to immediately realize, no one knows wtf I'm saying!

Now, I realize that English is not, by any means, an easy language to learn; I have mad respect for anyone who knows it as a foreign language. But, at least it makes sense. Or maybe it doesn't really make sense, but at least there's a rule to site whatever strange grammatical situation. With Georgian, holly shit, there are no rules. At least, it really truly feels that way.

To start, I had to learn an entirely new alphabet. Take a look at it, it's quite a lovely alphabet, I think; but at least 6 of the 36 letters, I can hardly distinguish their sounds. Two P sounds, two K sounds, two T sounds, and two Ts sounds, of which the last four all sound the same to my amateur ear. And don't even get me started on the letters that make sounds I cannot even imitate! A Georgian's favorite pass time is having me pronounce each letter and then laughing at me: “Listen. T, T, T. It's in the throat! It's in the throat!” they say. Yea, easy for you to say, Georgian! Now, you pronounce Th! Th, Th, Th. Eh? Not so easy, is it, Georgian? Not so easy... And then I breathe deeply and wait for my heart rate to slow and the blood flow to return to my clenched fists... (but not really, though, teehee).

My biggest and most ignorant frustration is the fact that most words don't have a direct translation. This is a dumb thing to stress about, because I logically understand that only concepts or meanings really translate. But alas, I'm as ethnocentric as anyone, and I often find myself thinking “how could you not have a word that means exactly what I want to say?!”

As for the actual grammatical structure of the language, it's really quite difficult to follow. Here's what I do understand. There seems to be no infinitive form for most words; one cannot say to eat or to go. In Georgian, there is only past, present, and future form. Sounds simple enough. Except each word has 7 forms. You cannot simply say eat to communicate your desire or need to eat. You must add one of the 7 prefixes or a suffixes to a root verb in order for it to make sense and actually be a recognizable word. For example, to express that I will be going to Tbilisi, I would need to say “Mivdivart Tibilshi;” this would change if I were expressing that you are going to Tbilisi: “Midikhart Tibilshi;” or he/she/it is going to Tbilisi: “Midis Tibilshi” Do you see where a whole bunch of the English form was conjugated in the Georgian form?

Additionally, word order doesn't really seem to matter in most cases, from what I have figured out. To say I am Klara, I can say Me var Klara, but Klara var will do must as well. This is a simple example,, but I think it applies in most cases.

It is also quite a trip for me that mother is deda and father is mama.  The hardest word for me to learn was teacher, which is ironic cause I hear the word ALL of the time: mastsavlobeli. My favorite word is Shakuarebuli, or lover cause it has a sweet meaning rather than a dirty one like in English. I also enjoy using mets instead of me too; this one, I'll be using long after I'm back in the states. And by far, I get the greatest kick out of Yea, boy -- ho, bitcho! How fantastic is that?!?! Ho and Bitch in reference to men? How fitting! ;)

Now, I apologize because I am well aware that this is a horrible explanation of the language, but the truth is, I have a horrible understanding of it. All I know is that I just ordered two shawarmas and some cokes all on my own in Georgian, and that's good enough for me!